


Rock ‘N’ Roll Suicide

by inthroughtheoutdoor



Category: Led Zeppelin
Genre: Angst, Crying, Drabble, Drug Addiction, Heartbreak, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-26
Updated: 2020-02-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:53:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22901998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inthroughtheoutdoor/pseuds/inthroughtheoutdoor
Summary: Chasing the dragon was Jimmy’s favorite pastime.
Relationships: Jimmy Page/Robert Plant
Comments: 5
Kudos: 27





	Rock ‘N’ Roll Suicide

**Author's Note:**

> hi! i wrote this little drabble because i needed some angst on here >_< it deals with heavy topics like drug abuse, so warning for that. this kinda made me really sad while writing it
> 
> title based off the david bowie song. i thought it fit pretty well.
> 
> takes place in 1977

Tears fell down Robert’s face as he sat on the floor with Jimmy. He was behind him with his arms wrapped tightly around his chest. Jimmy was crying too, being rocked side to side slowly by a sobbing Robert.

Robert, the normally happy one. Robert, the one with the constant beaming smile. He was crying over Jimmy.

Jimmy was losing himself. He had been for a few years now. Chasing the dragon was an everyday thing, a high he sought after and thought about as soon as he woke up every morning.

When he was preparing his fix before a gig in the States, Robert took notice of it and his face went pale.

There was an uncomfortable silence until he spoke up.

“You’re gonna die if you keep this up,” Robert said, staring at the floor.

“I know,” Jimmy replied.

Robert was very aware and had been for a long time. He always pleaded for Jimmy to stop. Jimmy never did. He wanted to, but he was always held back. He hated to say it, but he valued the high a little more. He didn’t care about the amount of money he had to pay for the drug. He didn’t care about having to stick the needle in his vein. It no longer made him squeamish. He just needed it, somehow, some way.

How did he get here? Pot was the only drug he’d done for a very long time. In fact, when he and Robert first met and became closer, they smoked pot together at his Pangbourne home while discussing their favorite music and inspirations. He didn't know how heroin came into his life. He didn’t remember. As far as he was concerned, he started doing it one day, and he’s been hooked ever since.

He promised to stop for Robert. And he tried, he really did. But it didn’t take long for him to get his hands on some more of the drug. While Robert was going about his days thinking Jimmy was finally starting to get clean, he was shooting up behind his back. Obviously, this secret didn’t last.

Robert found him sitting on the floor, preparing a syringe full of it. He screamed and broke down immediately. Jimmy’s face reddened with guilt. He didn’t know what to say. His mind was wiped blank as soon as he looked up at Robert, standing over him with his head in his hands. He kept asking Jimmy why he was doing this and said he thought he was getting clean. Jimmy said nothing. Tears welled up in his eyes as Robert shook and sniffled. Robert got down to his level and wrapped his arms around him.

And that leads us to now. Those were the events that led up to what was going on at this very moment.

Jimmy felt Robert’s shaking body against his back. He just cried harder. He didn’t know what to do or say, because he was guilty. There was nothing he could do to cover his ass because the proof was right there. He figured he deserved to feel this guilt, though. He made a very important promise to Robert and he broke it. He wondered why he was so weak and why he couldn’t just drop the drug. The withdrawals weren’t worth it. The heartbreak of his loved ones wasn’t worth it. The dragon wasn’t worth chasing.

He could have sworn he heard Robert mumble “I love you.” It sent a shiver down his spine. He looked at the syringe that laid on the ground. It looked disgusting to him. Everything looked disgusting. He felt disgusting. He felt like a piece of shit for causing Robert to cry.

Jimmy let Robert hold him, because he knew that’s what he needed at that moment. Robert needed to feel close to the person he loved most again, because God knows he rarely ever did. They sat for a while, crying and shaking as one.

Jimmy wiped his eyes and wiggled to break free from Robert’s strong arms. He turned around to face him, something he dreaded doing. He felt he couldn’t bear looking in his eyes again. But he did. He looked at Robert’s red face and stared at him through curly bangs and glossy eyes.

Robert looked at him. He exhaled a shaky breath and wiped his eyes before hiding his face behind his hands again. He broke down a second time, starting to softly sob.

“I’m losing you, Jimmy. Where’s my Pagey? The one I used to know?”

“Percy… I - I’m right here,” Jimmy said, sounding like he was on the verge of tears again.

“No you’re not,” Robert said, sniffling afterward. “Just fucking look at yourself. You’re not the same man you were in 1968. You’ve lost the spark in your eyes, Jimmy. Where are you?”

Tears rolled down Jimmy’s face again and he held Robert close to him. He stroked his hair and kissed his head. Robert wrapped his arms around him tightly, never wanting to let go.

The same words played over and over in Jimmy’s head.

Where are you, where are you, where are you?

He didn’t know.


End file.
